Wednesday, March 2, 2011

On becoming 40...

Out of my close to 14,600 days on earth... I never, we never, regret our journey to the Amish faith...
God lead us there

and God led us away...
These 400+ days were some of the richest of my 40 years on this earth...
Today I am thankful for the opportunity...
And today I am blessed that we did not tread farther... It has been such a bittersweet experience... Here is a short "journal entry":
...and today, January 3, 2011 I can say without regret that I am so thankful we did not join the Amish church.
God is good to babies and fools. No, that is not a verse in the Bible. I am not saying we were foolish as I would live that entire year as an Amish family all over again! I am not saying we were babies to explore this lifestyle. I will say that there was a small touch of both of these in us though. By the grace of God, He led us out of the lifestyle that is idealistic to many.
We learned more than ever to depend on our every next move from God with Him telling us what to do next. We learned what living simply actually means – it is going without a lot… Overall, I would still say the Amish lifestyle is about 90% correct! I bet that is closer to what we should all be than what we are living now possibly…

Some days I feel as if we are leaving our ultra-conservative lifestyle a bit. It’s hard to have lived 37 years as we did and not to be pulled back into some of that. We went Christmas shopping at a large local Amish store for some small gifts for the children. I left there crying silently. I cried because of what was gone and I cried for what could have been. I miss the smells, the shy smiles, the melodic language and the naivety. I do not miss the secrets, the pride, the lies and the coldness. Leaving the Amish has been bittersweet for us. But as we come full circle it has become more sweet… Sweeter as the days go by…
In the spirit of farming, family and faith,
HomemakerAng

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